Spaghettini with Broccoli, Tomatoes and Paprika Shrimp

Did you know that broccoli makes you grow taller?

And that tomatoes have anti-aging benefits?

And that garlic reduces heart disease? I’m not making this shizz up.

OK. Party started. Garlic in pan.

Add tomatoes before the garlic gets tooooo brown.

Parboil the broccoli. Go by color. You want it to turn a bright green. It’ll happen fast so watch it.

Run it under cold water so that it stops cooking when you take it out of the pot.

Scoop the tomatoes from the pan and set aside.

The Latin word for shrimp is squilla. I looked that up online.

I am going to eat you.

Throw the broccoli into the same pan you sauteed the garlic and tomatoes in.

Commercial break to introduce Parmigiano.

Spaghettini! With an exclamation point!

Here’s where we a get a little Paul Flatow (my dad)-inspired. Hot oil, garlic and paprika. Heat her up.

Douse the shrimp with paprika.

Into the pot she goes.

Oh! Our spaghettini is ready!

But back to the sizzlin’ shrimp. Give her a flip.

Remember the tomatoes? Make them hang out with broccoli over there.

Toss together...

Hot damn.

Chicken and Mushroom Marsala

Thinly slice your mushrooms.

Thinly slice your onion.

Pat dry your chicken boob. Season with salt & pepper.

Some butter. Some oil. Get it hot, but not smokin’. Brown the boobs.

Like so.  

On deck: mushrooms and onions.

Batter up.

The secret ingredient to chicken & mushroom marsala? MARSALA. (Like 1/2 cup.) Only add it once the liquid from the mushrooms has gone bye-bye.

Don’t stir too much. Let it do its thang.

Add 3/4 cup of chicken broth + the boobs. Turn over just once.

Fresh prince of parsley.

Bam.

Spinach Tortellini with Prosciutto, Pesto and Mushrooms

What my boyfriend's mother made for my boyfriend's birthday dinner.

That is one lucky boyfriend.

The address is on the bag. Go to there.

As an aside, you can click on my Neighborhood page to read all about the history of Caputo's Fine Foods!

Prep time. Chop yer garlic.

Wash and dry your ‘shrooms.

Take a picture of your spinach…

But then wash that, too.

I feel like fresh prince of parse goes into EVERYTHING, don’t you?

Basil grows in my parents’ driveway. Make a bouquet!

Now rip those damn leaves off.

And then I killed your vegetarian tortellini dream.

Prosciutto’s close-up because we’re so happy she’s here.

The only thing she’s missing is a cape.

Ok, so now it’s time to saute all this shizz. Olive oil in a pan. In goes garlic.

Prosciutto, chopped, follows. Let it brown…

And then add your ‘shrooms.

(Left) Boiling water for your torts. (Right) Covered pan of garlic, prosciutto & ‘shrooms.

Cook for a good while until your ‘shrooms shrink and brown.

Also, realize that you only have 30 minutes until the season 4 premiere of Jersey Shore. Freak out a little bit.

Brown and Beautiful.

Fwish! In flies your chopped basil and parse.

Prosciutto sure looks healthy when spinach is covering it!

The spinach wilts down in a matter of minutes and this is what it looks like.

The address is on the container. Again, go to there.

OBVIOUSLY.

Hoo boy.

Fettucine with Broccoli and Anchovy Sauce

Make like Dana Carvey and choppa ya broccoli.

Peel your garlic. Go nuts.

I like mine chopped like so.

Steam your broccoli for 5 or so minutes.

I know what you’re thinking. Anchovies, gross. Only Ninja Turtles like anchovies.

But it’s just for that salty flavor. Chop it up real small. It’s just gonna melt in the pan when you throw it in. Melt away gross, little anchovies.

Raisins for sweetness. 

Choose your pasta of choice.

Pour a good amount of olive oil into the pan because this will essentially be your sauce. Toss garlic in. Don’t let it burn.

Add the oil from the anchovy can… then the chopped anchovies… then as many raisins as your little raisin heart desires. I did a couple handfuls.

Get your broccoli back in there.

Serve, eat, enjoy (and post pics before American Idol starts).  

Matzoh Ball Chicken Soup

Yum.

First,  you'll have to buy a chicken and pretend it wears glasses.

Get some leeks, carrots, dill, turnip, celery and parsnip. Wash ‘em.

Throw it all into a pot. Make it look pretty.

Cover everything with water, then bring to a rapid boil. Let simmer. For hours. Days.

Make matzoh ball mixture. I went with eggs, duck fat, cayenne, seltzer, grated onion, cold water, salt, pepper, and matzoh meal.

CHILL FOR ONE HOUR.

Make balls. Drop suckers into boiling water.

Pull apart chicken a day later. Snack on some latkes while you wait around.

Have Dad blow on hot ball.

Impress Grandma with soup.